I hope you find your way:

As you wonder through your teenage years
I am reminded by the confusion of my own
As you search for whom you are meant to be
I remember the time I finally found myself
As you navigate the paths of the social maze
I contemplate my own difficulties
As you encounter this thing called love
I think of how I still struggle to understand
As you search to find your place in this world
I am reminded of how I am still looking
As you look for people to point you to the right path
I too am looking for those people
As you acquire wisdom to help guide yourself
I never stop seeking that which can better my life
As you send your prayers out hoping they will be heard
I still send mine somewhere, wanting the answers
As you grow tired of life and living has lost its allure
I tell you to keep moving for it will get better
As you cuddle a new living person, you are hoping you won’t make mistakes
I see the mistakes I made and the many more yet to come
As your life endures pain from every side
I challenge you to embrace them and let them teach you
As you look for happiness in every person or place
I tell you, you will only find it within yourself
As your paths grow dark and you’re not sure where to go
I will remind you to just keep moving and never stop believing in yourself

Please Let Me Go….

I ponder again and again the inevitability of
Day after day I wrestle with the master of this hell
If I could cut it from me I would sharpen the blade quickly
To hold myself captive to this prison is mine own ignorance
I am reminded every sunrise and sunset of this poisonous pursuit
I curse at myself for letting it become this
I have brought this treachery upon me
Why? The question requires an answer
I cannot come up with any words. I am speechless
I want out, I tell myself today
I no longer am a willing participant, but yet I play on
Forced by the allure of the elixir that awaits me
As freedom is just steps away
I taste again, and I am back in it’s vice fighting for my sanity
I want to tell the world of you, but in regret I purse my lips
For to be free of you is what I want, yet I embrace you all the more
I tell my heart to please let me go
I don’t want anymore. I’ve had all I can take. I want it to be over.

As I wrestle with the tomorrows of yesterday
I still see her up close from afar.
The beauty of the fear that reigns unrestrained
My memories are still forgotten.
She runs free through the pathways of my dreams
I lie awake through the sight of my sleep as I watch her.
The captivity of the prisoner that thinks he is loosed
She keeps the keys to the open lock before him.
When will the senseless acquire knowledge to flee
Instead he safely puts himself in harms way again.
The healing power of the venom is the illusion
He smartly plays the fool for her to see.
The cracks of the smooth walkways are crumbling behind
Where the habits repeat themselves only once.
The ease of the difficulties must be seized again
Because of the importance that it doesn’t matter anymore.
I must run far away to get closer
I will scream so it can be quiet again.
The lights are shining so the darkness can be seen
Her amorous nature is cool to his touch.
The admiring eyes are passionately indifferent.
Step on me again so you may come down.
What are you doing when you have ceased moving
My heartbeat races as it stops again.
I want to put my arms around you so I can hold nothing once more
The sights of you hiding behind the walls.
I asked you what your walls are made of for they are so high
You responded with no words so that I can hear you.
Please cover yourself with the assurance of not knowing
For once more I quit so that it can start again.

Illusion of my Creation

Your light pierces my darkest places
Hoping to find myself through you.
In a thousand lies, I hear your voice
The crushing weight of my expectations
You find me in the corner
Trembling from my own shadows
You keep me locked and twisted inside
As I spread my wings
You tear them from my limbs
My voice is the revealing siren
The echoes of you replay
The screams are coming from within
Set me free.

The house of cards have faltered
The secrets have shown their veracity
To what have I placed my trust
Hopelessness has entangled me a final time
What else is there to keep my path before me
As the fear passes through me it scars me
Deliver me my redeemer, come quickly
The day curses me with no end
With vengeance and remorse I curse back
Who will restrain me? Who can tie my hands?
I tread among your graves
Your victims still speak of your horror
I speak back, but not of your terror
For you have had your last breath
I have snatched the life out of you
Your hollowness is the reward
Weep for yourself for I need not your pity
When you look upon me you will not find me
For you are the illusion of my creation

She wakes each morning in the spring of youth
Reminded by her loved ones that beauty beholds her
As a rose in full bloom, so she is compared
That she is the completion of divine ability
She glows like the new day
Her soul mirrored by her reflection

The years go by like a faint memory
The lies now become truth

She imprisons herself in the dungeon of redifinement

She wakes each morning in the autumn of maturity
Reminded by the mirror of her incompleteness
She is crushed by the weight of her own comparison
She succumbs to her deliverer by the hands of a physician
The broken now repaired. The veracity of the alluring now forsaken
As she defines her beauty by the emaciated model
Whatever is seen she swallows immediately
The exquisite can be acquired from a jar

She wakes each morning in the winter of age
Seeing her beauty as it was intended to be
Time has now wasted what she had purchased
Understanding her slavery, she curses her own lies
Her own reflection is her warden, true glory has eluded her
That beauty should reside in the hollowness of soul
Awakened by the truth that it dwells not outside her, but in the radiance of her being.
Shine bright my love, let your light eradicate the darkness of imperfection

It reminds me and then I forget...

I breathe the air, and forget how to live.
I see the sun, and forget about the light.
I see my parents, and forget to return the favor.
I see my lover, but forget about the love.
I see my children, but forget about guiding them.
I have friends all around, but forget about being a friend.
I feel the earth below me, but forget to care for it.
I eat every day, but forget to give thanks.
I have my job, but forget to do well.
I had the chance to make the difference, but forget to make it.
I invested in my education, but forget to listen.
I have seen my life change, but I forget to change with it.
I see the alcohol, but forget to respect it.
I have the drugs in my hand, but forget to fear it.
I have my brain in my head, but forget about my mind.
I have my spirit inside me, but forget to consider it.
I have my health, but forget to care for it.
I have unforgiveness around me, but I forget to forgive.
I see the imperfections of others, but I forget about mine.
I see the person in need, but I forget that I have it.
I see their heart breaking, but forget about empathy.
I see the hate that they give, but forget about giving it.
I see the elderly, but forget about history.
I heard about death…….but it did not forget about me!